Happy Birthday, Ryan & Quinn (6.3.10)

Ryan David Greenwood Clanahan - born at 6:55pm on June 3rd, 2010, weighing 5lbs 2oz, 16 3/4 inches long.
Quinn Eugenie Clanahan - born at 6:56pm on June 3rd, 2010, weighing 3lbs 13 oz and measuring 17 inches long.

Ryan was checked out by the pediatric unit at birth and given a clean bill of health. Because he was so strong, he has been able to stay with us since the first night. What a huge blessing. He is a joy and such a great baby so far. He loves to cuddle with his mommy and daddy and HATES having his diaper changed. He has been eating well and sleeping great.

Quinn, as we anticipated, was whisked away to the NICU after birth. I was able to see her for one minute in the operating room while she was in her incubator. Matt followed her to the NICU with my mom to get her settled and find out a quick report. She obviously was much smaller than we thought -- but still very strong. She was stable almost immediately and has been watched very closely by the cardiac team since her birth. She has not required any surgery/stints/oxygen or meds for her heart condition. This was a big victory for her! She was started on formula yesterday (Friday) and has done pretty well with it -- although by nightime, she gets pretty lazy and falls asleep before the feeding is over. She is fiesty in every other way, always moving and squirming just like she did in the womb. Ry is much more content to lay there and Quinn just wants to see everything that's going on! She LOVES her huge green paci they gave her and she's so tiny that it takes up much of her face. She is precious and we look forward to her being able to head home with us - perhaps as soon as 2 weeks!

After running back and forth between the NICU and our regular room, both Matt & I are pretty tired but we are THRILLED to be parents. It blows me away that these kiddos were the same ones I carried for almost 36 weeks. Matt is such an awesome dad, changing most of the diapers and handling the first feedings. He has been so amazing and I couldn't ask for a better partner in all of this. I have to say that these have been some of the sweetest days of my life. Just spending time rocking and loving on my kids makes my heart almost burst with joy. I could stare at them forever and very often do :) I honestly was scared to death that I wouldn't know ohow to feel "motherly" towards these 2 little babies --- and while it's such a cliche to say, it just comes naturally. I haven't done everything perfect, that's for sure (just ask Ry and his backwards diaper) but I feel like I know what they want and what will soothe them. What a cool thing.

And while these have been sweet days for sure, it still has been agony on my heart to only be able to hold little Quinn for short periods of time and then to have to leave her behind in a totally separate building. I hate that my kiddos are separated from each other and from us. Tonight I couldn't stop crying when I saw her --- I hadn't been able to see her all day and I felt incredibly guilty. Here I had spent all this time with Ryan but hadn't even been able to even say good morning to my daughter. I just prayed that she would remember me as her momma and even though we have to spend a lot of time apart right now, I just pray she will instictively know us. It's going to be a tough couple of weeks, having to leave her behind constantly -- but I thank God that the doctors have taken such awesome care of her and made it even possible for her to come home with us until she needs surgery.

We are so blessed. God has answered so many prayers and moved in so many amazing ways in our lives these past 3 days. Thank you all who have been praying for my little ones. They are precious and perfect in every way. Pics to come soon - the hospital internet connection makes it difficult to even get one picture uploaded.

Love,

Meagan