So today I had my weekly ultrasound and I received the most unexpected gift.
If you've read the past few entries of this blog, you know things have been kind of rough in this neck of the woods. Matt's parents are both ill and I apparently have lost all semblance of reason and crash cars through garage walls. Today was an especially tough day because Matt's dad had his first appointment at MD Anderson and we are expecting to find out the course of treatment and prognosis sometime tomorrow.
So things haven't exactly "light" around the house lately to say the least. And I have been in kind of a funk, which doesn't help matters. I am totally in that bad self-esteem pregnancy stage where I am just feeling chunky monkey and all the food I am eating is going to my face and thighs and not my belly. And couple that with the new fresh array of zits lighting up my face... well, yup - let's just say I am not glowing yet. Although someone told me the other day that my face "looked beautiful and just like a moon". Ummm, excuse me, but that doesn't really sound like a compliment to me --- moon face??
Anyway, moving on before I dive too deeply in my pit of self-despair.
So I think the babies knew that Mommy & Daddy needed some good news today. I had a nice little chat with them on the way to the appointment. I told them I would pretty please like for them to smile nicely in just one picture with the 2 of the together. I also told them to be total show-offs, show us all what you can do and how much you have grown. (Side Note: This should not be considering a forewarning for me being a stage mom, right??)
Ok, back to the probe/ultrasound - right away the two most adorable aliens pop up on the screen. That's the only way to describe them at this point. Alien-like (although they are the size of kumkuats this week in case you want to look that up) But they are bascially huge heads and bodies. The huge head part doesn't surprise me - they're coming from Matt & I's stock, and we have notoriously large noggins.
So as he is doing his thing, capturing heartrates (166 for B) (158 for A), and take measurements, I am just starting at awe at the camera. Then.
"What was that? Did you just move something around"
"Nope, that was all baby moving around there."
AWWWWWW our babies are moving - quite a lot in fact. It touched me in a way that was unexpected. Today I just thought I was going in for the weekly deal, check it all out, make sure we still had heartbeats and growth and then be out of there. So to see this, on a totally unexpected day, was completely amazing for me.
Tears did flow for the first time since we initially saw our "spots" on the sonogram.
In the midst of all the darkness, chaos and the storms in our lives, there are 2 growing little babies, discovering new things everyday as they develop into our children. They are blissfully protected from the outside stress - so that's my biggest goal right now - not to let my stress affect one iota of their development. That's my job now, The Protector. Couldn't think of anything else I'd rather watch over than these precious two.
I only wish that during all their movement they somehow could have held up a little signal, like "Hey,I'm a girl" or "Here's your boy!". I guess that would have been too much to ask :) 6 weeks and hopefully we will know and then this can really get serious.
Anyway, that's all I gots for right now - it's late and I have the pure excitement of driving to the courthouse tomorrow morning to plead my case as to why I should be exempted from serving on a jury. Those M&M's will serve as primary reason #1 and #2, followed closely by my argument that I am allergic to eggs, thus cannot receive the H1N1 vaccine and shouldn't be around people at all. And I have a couple of others in my back pocket just in case that's not enough for them. I feel bad, 6 months ago, I would have been happy and perhaps even excited to give it a shot. Right now, no. Not a good season. Try me back later Fort Bend County.
Y'all have a great week. Please continue to keep my Father -in-law, David in your prayers.