Well, today was "The Day". The day to confirm that I could start my injections and all the fun stuff that follows (like 5-10 extra lbs I'm told). I went this morning, and I am not kidding you, I was shaking like a leaf. I can talk in front of people with little or no problem, used to advise people on their financial difficulties, and have plain just experienced a lot in the last few years. But this had me completely on edge.

Anyway, I made my way to the appointment and the actual appointment could not have gone better. We started with the bloodwork and then the baseline ultrasound - which showed approximately 8-9 follicles on my left ovary and 9-10 on my right ovary (The follicles are where the hopefully mature eggs are going to come from). They are always hestitant to give averages - but I hear this was pretty good and my nurse said everything looked "GREAT". So I felt GREAT.

Then onto med injection lessons.


I certainly don't think I am the brightest star in the sky but I'm not a complete moron. This kind of made me feel like a moron. I asked a bazillion and one questions but luckily my nurse was more than happy (well, she may feel differently) to spend a quality hour reviewing this stuff with me. So I received my tenative schedule for all the meds - it's kind of mindblowing and if I ever figure out how to post it up here, I will.

So I left there feeling completely confident, "I can do all" - women-power kind of thing.

Came home, was still on a fertility high I guess, emailed and called all my folks who give a darn.

Cooked dinner, had a glass of wine. All was looking well. But the injections were staring me in the face.

The Meds. For today.

It was time.

I had Matt go get me yogurt to celebrate the occasion because any medical crisis should involve ice cream. I sprung for the cookies n cream. (which I have not eaten by the way, b/c I am writing this - but it will be eaten and soon)

Pre-shot excitement - whoo hoo - we have our own bio hazard box!

So while he was getting yogie, I started setting up my "area". Cotton swabs, needles, pluggie things, powders, fluids, and who knows what.

At last minute, I decided to change from the original recommendation of putting them both together and only having one injection to doing them separately. I just got too stressed to have to mix all that stuff and was having massive brain freezes like I had in history 3001 classes in college.

First shot up - Menopur. Small needle. I like that. Mixed the powder (the expensive stuff) and the sodium stuff (not expensive) - done. I'm a champ. Insert needle, pull back on syringe, grab belly and push. ummm pushed maybe a little too hard b/c some dripped on the floor. Yikes, mistake #1.

Push it aside, we gotta another one to go.

2nd one - Gonal F. It's a handy syringe that is pre-filled. Well, seems handy until you can't actually tell if the liquid is released into your body BECAUSE IT PRE-FILLS BACK UP. nice.

Pretty sure I double injected that one.

Prompt panic call to the on-call nurse who immediately dispatches me to my nurse. OOOps sorry Vanessa - didn't mean to ruin your evening, but I'm pretty sure I just double-dosed myself. She had me run through what I did exactly and then her diagnosis came. "Yup, you double dosed"

But then the good news. She would rather me double dose than not have a dose. And thank God for them checking levels all.the.time. This stuff can totally be adjusted. Freak out panic attack semi over.

After my double-dose and triple stick. Awesome.

Now I am ready for bed. I've cried 3 times today. I'm pretty sure it's not hormone related but I'm going to go ahead and blame it on a pre-hormone related syndrome. Sounds good to me.

For your viewing pleasure and for my posterity, I have uploaded pictures of the last days I will have a semi flattish belly. I kid you not, when Matt took this picture, he was like "quit sucking in!!".

Pre-Belly shot (and the last time I will post a flat belly shot on the web)

"Umm, why would I if it's going to be posted on the world wide web. I will suck in and suck in and suck in until there is no air left in my body."

So Day 1 Wrap-Up - a success and a sorta failure. Tomorrow will be better. I have been assured though that I have not caused any irreparable harm. However, if I don't get pregnant, you know this day will probably haunt me - what if?... ok, no more negative thoughts - lots more shots to look forward to! And one more night to enjoy a semi-flat, yet slightly bruised belly!

In His Mighty Hands,


1 comment:

Lisa said...

Such a brave girl!! You know it reminds me of when I bought baby furniture for Grace. Granted I was already pregnant, but for me that is when it really sunk in that I was going to bring a baby home - I had a total panic attack! I even returned one of the peices of furniture. Anyway, point is - its real now. Scary and all together super exciting!! We are rooting for you guys!